I feel in a bit of a panic this morning. We have had some amazing successes and some confusing set backs in the past couple of weeks. Having three launching, (one finishing college and twins finishing high school) leaves me with very mixed feelings. One day, one child is getting everything they dreamed and the next day, another has a set back. Then within a day or two, it all changes again. Every set back makes me question whether I have done enough, have I given them what they needed, is this my fault? Homeschooling adds added pressure to what all parents feel. It can be really difficult.
As I was sitting in my chair, drinking my tea, God quietly reminded me that He loves them more than I do and that He has plans for good, and not for evil for all of their days. Those plans may not be the neat, tidy package (like everyone staying here in Colorado within 15 min of me) like I want, but in the end, I have to release them to Him. It’s so very hard, but I know His plans are always better than mine.
It’s funny that I struggle with this very thing at all the stages, the first time they went to Sunday School without me, the first time they spent a night away, the first time they went on an airplane without me, the first time they took a standardized test, the first time they drove away on their own. Reminding myself, again, to keep my hands opened towards Him, to let my precious kids go into His care. I think it’s as much of a growth opportunity for me as it is for them.
