Last week, both Caileigh and Collin got acceptances from their first choice for college. We were ecstatic, there might have even been dancing . As we read further, though, we realized that Collin hadn’t been accepted into the College of Engineering. We did a fast double take. Wait, what? Collin tests in the top 97%, the school offered him a lot of scholarships and he has a 4.3 GPA. He’s been a lead in a Robotics team that placed 3rd in the World Championship. This is a good school, but not a highly selective was one and he’s been accepted already into the highly selective ones. So, either there was some huge human error or God had another plan for Collin.
We prayed (and asked all our prayer warriors to pray for clear direction) and sought wisdom all weekend and then on Monday called and sent an email to his college admissions advisor. On Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday mornings we also called and left messages. Overkill? Maybe, but as they weren’t responding, we needed to make sure we were heard. We had not received a direct, ‘no’ from God so we decided that we would keep moving until we did. This afternoon, we got a phone call from the admission’s advisor telling us that Collin had been accepted into the College of Engineering and into his preferred, very competitive Aerospace. Yeah God!
The lesson here was that we, as parents and especially as homeschoolers, need to be advocates for our kids through this beginning college stage. Collin sat next to me and wrote the email to the advisor. I was modeling how to be an advocate. For Connor, I did the research and found out that he qualified for an extra $10,000 in scholarships, so I called the school, talked to the Bursar’s office and got the extra money. It can be a little scary and intimidating, but after talking to some of my friends who work in schools, the best High School Counselors are advocates for their students in this way. We, as homeschoolers, have to add High School Counselor on to our already full plate, but I have found that colleges are more than happy to work with me. They have been pleasant and willing to answer any questions or concerns, but I have to be persistent and follow through. I am my child’s best advocate. I am polite and respectful but persistent.
By the time Connor was in College, he asked me how to go about advocating for himself but since his first year, hasn’t needed my help. He’s petitioned for a better grade due to unfair grading, which he won, petitioned to skip a lower level class, which he didn’t win, and for an extension for his thesis as he had emergency surgery, which he won. He’s polite and respectful but persistent.
It’s important that we step in and be our student’s High School Counselor and advocate. It’s equally important to teach them how to do it themselves and then get out of the way.
Really an excellent article! As mom’s and dad’s and homeschoolers, we need to remember the “teaching by example” method is usually a top method in training our children to “do it on their own.
Great example!
I remember when my high schooler felt too intimidated to order a pizza over the phone because there was a scary adult on the other side! Now, and over time, she has gained confidence enough to advocate for herself in her classes she takes outside the home. She’s has had grades corrected/improved and learned to ask clarifying questions. This ability is so important for our young people to learn!